Among all the great calypsonians, there one who stands out, not necessarily the best, but the best at what he did.
The Mighty Spoiler (Theophilus Phillip) or Spoilo, had the most creative imagination, like no one else. He went off the beaten path of topics.
He was not a maker of Road Marches, but he built a collection of calypsoes no other calypsonian has come close to.
Here is a list of his compositions—some recorded, others not; some lost, some ever living.
Fountain of Youth
Magistrate Try Yourself
Money In The Bank
Small Island Carnival
Picking Sense Out of Nonsense
All Fools Day
Wars of Long Ago
Believe It or Not
Police Women In Panama
Nylon For Yvonne
Girl With Glasses
Spoiler Went to College
A Deaf, Blind and Naked Fellow
Bacchanal In Texas
Ugly Girls with Pretty Names
*Schemers With Briefcases
*Laughing Man by Salvatori’s
*The Star Restaurant [Commercial]
*The Longest Story Ever Told
*Dumb Concert In France
(*These last eight may not have been recorded, even though there are recordings by other singers in a “lime”.)
These are parts of his calypsoes I remember:
Lleh me break he neck, some ah dem go say
Ah hungry, meh wife cook ah fowl today
If you disagree, well is cuff an butt
Ah man life eh more important dan ah fowl foot.
“Bacchanal In Texas”
Bacchanal down in Texas, murder
Ah reach there in time for fiesta [repeat]
Walk in the place, Mr Gene Autry
Started his yippi ai yippe e
Ah sing a calypso in the place
You would know how dem cowboys
could jock dey waist
It was ah carnival and ah royal bacchanal
Deep in the heart of Texas
Man the whole place was like a Monday Carnival
Deep in the heart of Texas.
Ah see ah roast horse on top a table
Right dey ah started to grumble
Gone with meh bad habits down in Texas
Pounding up the table when I eh get breakfast.
Rum bacchanal hear the confusion
Vat 19 call Mount Gay a small islan’ [repeat]
Mount Gay say you too fas’ to call me such
He went an’ he call Goddards, others and Topnotch
Ah feel bad to see 4 Barbajans
Standin’ up to beat one Trinidadian.
So mountain dew jump in the brew
Yuh fight up wid Vat you fight me too
Be careful how yuh hating meh pardner
Meh razor in meh han’
Yuh go spoil meh character.
Well friends next day was the case
But kakapoule come as false witness
Kiss the Bible an’ decide to tell the truth
But he lying all the time in the people court
Kate Express was the lawyer for the accuse
But that woman had the lawyer confuse
Believe ah put ah glad on meh face
When the magistrate say I dismiss dis case.
“Laughing Man by Salvatori’s”
(The laughing man was an animated figure sitting in a rocking chair. Every so often it would rock back, and the man would appear to be laughing with antics to give that impression. The figure was placed in one of the showcases at the bottom of Frederick Street for all to see.
The original building, Salvatori Scott & Co Ltd, was destroyed by fire.)
Las’ Christmas believe me
Ah couldn’t spend ah cent by Salvatori [repeat]
Ah want all you to believe me partner
Hundreds of people round the corner
See them in a jam
Everybody looking at the laughing man
Look at how he laughing [x4]
If yuh want to know
Ah fellow tief a pound of cheese up by Hi-Lo
But a policeman was on the beat
So the police arrest the thief
But as he reach by Salvatori
He stand up in amazement looking at he
He leggo the tief hand, he was in a jam
To stan up an look at the laughing man
Yes believe partner
That man by Salvatori is a healer
Man have work worries, they feel to dead
They going quite in savannah to shoot dey head
But when they reach by Salvatori
They stand up in amazement looking at he
He trow way the revolver and start the plan
To stand up and look at the laughing man.